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So, whats up with all the indirect pressure…

September 16, 2008

Whenever I tell someone that at this point in my life that I have no interest in ever getting into a relationship with someone, settling down and having kids, the whole 9 yards.  They always look at me like I am a moron.  I have never had much interest in relationships more than friendship.  I don’t really know why I have not been interested in them, just I don’t care.  Relationships just seem to be a silly waste of time with too many rules.  I guess that because of my life style I don’t think that someone would be able to cope with it.

I haven’t had a good nights sleep in almost 3 years.  I have not woken up feeling refreshed in almost 3 years, I don’t have any idea why.  I don’t know if these two things are related.  Considering that a relationship I was in ended 3 years ago, shortly after it ended I stopped sleeping well, or at least that’s when i started to notice it.  I am just tired of people being so confused with my decision to have no relationships beyond friendship.  I just don’t feel that I could love someone in the way needed to have a meaningful relationship with them.

I have no issue with being single forever.  I am just sick of people telling me that i must have a relationship, get married, have kids, etc.

The last time someone told me to do something was go to college, they said that “If you want to go anywhere in life you have to go to college…”  What a load of crap that was.  Granted some careers need a college education, but not all of them.  Why should I gamble potentially tens of thousands to hundreds of thousands of dollars.  Half of me  thinks I should get a student loan and then go to Vegas with it, it’s the same thing basically.  College doesn’t guarantee you anything at all.  All it does is gives you better chances of doing what you “love” Which after 4-8 years you are burnt out, and oh wait!  Now you have to work till you are 40 paying off student loans, college just doesn’t seem like a good investment.  The return on your money seems like such a gamble.  I would rather take the money for college and but an apartment complex and rent the rooms out, it would be a faster return.  Or buy a franchise…or start a franchise.

Basically what I am saying is that look at what people say they NEED to go far in life, and question it.  Do you really need to spend 8 years working your butt off to pass exams just to keep doing that same thing for the rest of your life, after college you are so burnt out on it you may not ever want to work in that field ever again, but alas you must because…well that is what you went to school for.  That is just stupid, plain and simple.  How many people do you know that work in the field that they went to college for?  I can name only a few…but nowhere near a majority.

I don’t need to get married, I don’t need to go to school.  I need the beach and I need my escape.  The only way I truly feel like a person is when I have to load in a show at 9am and have it up and running at 10am, high stress environments, not knowing if my next paycheck is going to cover all the bills.  It is a rush living on the edge, who in the right mind would take a full time job, Monday- Saturday…the same old thing, that repetitiveness would drive me mad.  Knowing that my next paycheck is going to be exactly as the one before it.  You have no ability to move about if your paycheck is exactly the same if you work 40 hours or 60 a week.  If I want to buy something I don’t have to save up for months.  I just have to work more.  Take a few more jobs, If I want to sit on a beach or on my computer for a week straight I can, If I want to work everyday for a month or 2 I can.

So take a look at what people around you are doing, don’t be so quick to judge them because, well…they are not like you, they don’t have the same social views as you.  You have no right to judge anyone on anything.

PS.  This is just a general statement, not directed at anyone in particular.  But is directed at people.

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